Sunday, March 2, 2008

65 days left...

This is just too awkward.

I woke up today and found that my dirty laundry was missing. So either some drunken criminal broke into my apartment and stole it, or - and this is the slightly more likely scenario - my mother picked it up while I was still sleeping (she has a key).

There was no note, nothing, she also didn't wake me, she just came in to take the laundry and left, which is something she has never done before. I'm getting fairly sure now that she read my note now, and that today she wanted to check on me before she took further action to stop me from doing it - whatever those actions may be.

I've finished writing all my suicide letters.

Right now I'm going to work on a plan of how to kill myself, and exactly where and when. Suggestions are welcome, if you can stomach being an accomplice to the inevitable.

47 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Lady,

My suggestion is not a sweet way to die but is one which may help some people.

Choose an Africa conflictive place, like Sierra Leona or Sahara and then carry a container of medicines and vaccines to help those people.

Be active part of the conflict, get a gun and when the unfair enemies come to kill those people, shot if you need to, and die with courage like an heroin.

Be part of the ONU to accomplish that.

Till that moment, Spring comes, so, Smile.

Today’s suicide song:

- Marilyn Manson:

The Nobodies

Sincerely Yours,

40.001 Admirer,

NoReplyBox

Anonymous said...

Hi Tania,
About your suicide notes: you should put them on your computer, not leave them around on pieces of paper for your mom to find.

About killing yourself: I don't know if this would work, but it is a nice idea. You should be able to go into a hospital and tell them that you want to donate all your orgsns to help save other people's lives. Seriously though, could you give someone one of your kidneys before you go?

Anonymous said...

my suggestion is to understand that after offering blow jobs, only stupid people will even consider that youre serious about this


anyway, down the road, not across the street.

Anonymous said...

why does everyone think she's going to kill herself? it even says the following on her god damn blog! "suicide isnt sexy, this is a ANTI (?!) suicide culture campain aimed at a disturbing internet trend that is currently gaining momentum: blogging about commiting suicide." it's just a god damn projekt. this is just a bitch that lies about things. there are plenty REAL suicide blogs out there, that is much more fun hanging on. this blog is just made by a attention craving whore.

Anonymous said...

I do not see how you are at all going out in style.
Albeit your ankle is sprained, you have not written about how you are going to live your life to the fullest in your final days.

It seems as if you are not ready to let go of your temporary life and do things that you would never have done otherwise.

Make a bucket list and do those things! Come on!

Anonymous said...

PLZ u shouldtn kill ur self ur betiful and u got good future plz dont kill yourself just live ur life u got FUCKING GOOD FUTURE PLS DONT!

Anonymous said...

she's not going to kill herself! it's a god damn art projekt!

GMSA said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

honestly?
i think you´re not going to do this for real..
cause
first.. any suicidal choose a day to kill himself
neither writes on a blog about his final days..
second.. if you want to suicide, why are you waiting so long?
are you waiting for some hope or anything that would change your mind?

life isn´t sucks
we make our lives sucks.. cause we want it to be suck. and you can´t blame life for what you want to do. blame just yourself

you can change life

aaa.. so many people getting killed in the world today.. people who desire to live a little longer, people that leave family, children, sadness and etc.. and you are thinking exactly the opposite.
this is how to be real coward
coward to the world and to yourself

i know my comment won´t change nothing on you idea, probably you won´t read it

but here it is
my comment
i just want u to not do this
but i´m nothing to you
u won´t care

so bye bye beautful lady
and good luck
=*

fabricio. from japan

Anonymous said...

Tania, I suggest getting Athene to do the honours. Afterall, he could easily pwn you.



...and if you're actually serious, just blow your brains out, that always makes for an interesting funeral story.

Anonymous said...

I think the best way to go is to just go quietly in your sleep. I am not quite sure how you can arrange for that to happen.

Anonymous said...

Lock your self in the garage and leave the car on. The exuast will eventualy kill you quickly and painless.

AK said...

Wear a whole ton of blackface and suffocate in a chimney accident, and call it, "The tragedy of the chimneysweep"

Anonymous said...

8 hits of acid + skydiving with no 'chute. That's how I'm going out.

Anonymous said...

Why would people blog about killing themselves?

Anonymous said...

This is so stupid for people to kill themselves, i mean like what the hell is it proving. And Tania is not really killing herself, it is a god damn lie.

Anonymous said...

Still, I cannot see the reason for suiside, this is a life, like athene sad, pro or nub, so where the problem?

Boy from Latvia

Anonymous said...

if you want to kill yourself for real one of the cooles ways to die is to stick a a razor blade stick * there hard to find but stick it in your lung and bleed to death but after you do it let it stay in for 3 seconds and then pull it out you die quick and the razor doesnt hurt.

Anonymous said...

Hi Tania,

How does Athene and iPower feel about your suicide? They talk about nonsense stuff that consist YouTube blocking their views.. and yet, they promote your blog?

I feel that your situation is much more important.. I know this might sound like any other comment but I think that you should reconsider about killing yourself..

If this suicide blog is a joke, you got me.. I just got punk'd.

Anonymous said...

Please give me your full name and your photo so that you can die of a heart attack.

Anonymous said...

suicide is a hard thing. the hose from a tail pipe to the inside of the car will scare you to death, if you turn on the car while you are inside. you would be surprised at how many gun shots fail. anti freeze drinking is a VERY PAINFUL way to go. most people want life to change, not die. after you wish for suicide for a long time, and get over the fear, which takes years, one day, you will wake up, and find death is something you are happy about. and see the world for what it is. some small life forms floating on a big rock in space. you are living by others, rules. live outside the box. it is the fear of death that scares you.

now, having said that, go, and LIVE LIFE ON YOUR TERMS. does it matter if you fail? you are going to be dead.

what would your terms be?

Anonymous said...

seriously, look on the top right sort of rectangle thing on the blog and look under the explanation of "why i am doing this". there is a little thing that says "Suicide isn't Sexy". Click it and all will be revealed. jeez.

Anonymous said...

Remember, Tania: Is it the world that doesn't understand you, or is it the fact that you don't want it to?

Always remember that, whether your serious about this or not.

My idea for your suicide is that you have as much sex as possible until you just die of fatigue.

Pleasure > pain. :]

Anonymous said...

Totally hop in your washer machine and turn that baby on HOT. Make sure someone is there to lock the door shut.

Anonymous said...

G'day.
i think you should at least post naked pictures first. or email them to davo_man@hotpop.com and that random person ( whoever he or she is ;)) will gladly accept it. If you do decide to kill yourself. You could jump out of a plane with a grenade and pull the pin just before you hit the ground. That way it will be fate to decide weather you are blown apart by a grenade or hit the earth at death defying speed.

Anonymous said...

I know! Order 20 pizza's, eat till you die. That would be a fancy way to go.

Death by Pizza. Please do it tomorrow, getting tired of showing up here every day and you're still alive. Get to the point lady.

Anonymous said...

Jump from a roof!

Anonymous said...

Although i am pretty sure, that she won't kill herself (who really wants to do it, would have done it already)

...although that, i understand your feeling of pointlessness of life. I have a similar feeling. A feeling that nothing big is happening. (you talked about no big war, no big problem to solve...nothing that moves everybody to a certain direction. A kind of boredom came to the 1st world...i compare it to the time before the first world war started. Everybody was bored and searched for adventure. Then the most horrible years in history changed the world forever. (1914-1945 ww1 - end of ww2)

If you ask people that lived through this, they won't tell you great stories...

Today nobody can force you to "adventure" ..if you want it, go for example to the belgian army. go to afghanistan! And understand the meaning of life! The meaning of life is and always was life itself. It is the nature of life to just be!
m.bal@azet.sk

Anonymous said...

go sky diving without a parchute, but b4 you jump pump yourself full of heroin, morphine or any other happy drugs(heroin, ketamine are strongly recomended). Thus you wont feel any pain or fear and would die happy. Tho anyone who truly wants to die would not feel afraid. And i dont think you are one of those people.

Anonymous said...

HI TANIA =D

John Patrick said...

Hi Tania,
It seems to me that you want to talk about death and suicide in a serious way. So here is my opinion ...

Death can be a welcome release sometimes. We all have to die eventually. You do not always have to avoid death. It is possible to go out and greet death and welcome him in - that is not suicide.

I hope you stay alive because I enjoy being alive in the same world with you - even if I never meet you in person.

- John

Anonymous said...

PLay wow and don't eat ! Get a uber guild, farm all instances without eat or drink !

I'll cheer !

Dr. Know said...

I agree with anonymous:
You should be able to go into a hospital and tell them that you want to donate all your organs to save other people's lives.
Seriously though, could you give someone one of your kidneys before you go? Or sell it, making some money for your family!
I can't hold you but sucide Isn't a solution! It wont help! Find a job, get busy, get a boyfriend and stop thinking about death!

Anonymous said...

Stupidest internet spoof ever. Post fucking noodz, or go ahead and end it all. Only the dumbest people in our society, would do this, or believe that someone would do this. You should all move to an island together, and clear space for the rest of us. Now post Noodz...

Anonymous said...

Rpc SD USA

Anonymous said...

dear tania,
i think the best way for you to go is to find a tall building in a city center, put a glass of water on the ground and dress in swimming gear. then, hen you jump off the building, try to land next to the glass XD. lets see wath people are gonna think of that ;)

groeten uit nederland

Anonymous said...

Hey Tania,

About the whole how, when, where, to kill yourself deal i have a few ideas;
I think if you don't want to damage your friends and family to much, [if you care] I would just fill up the bath tub, all the way to the top, get in, and take about a whole bottle of pills [or take them before you get into the tub]. Then just take a soak and wait for the pills to do there stuff. Maybe replay your life? I don't know, maybe even read your favorite book for the last time? But you could make it look as if you drowned or somthing.

If you want to damage your friends and family, [once again, if you care]take a crap load of pills, and leave the bottle on the table, and cut/ shoot yourself.

Take your pick I guess.

Whatever though.

Anonymous said...

this is bullshit

Anonymous said...

if there is anyone you ever really really wanted to fuck or even just kiss. do it, even through force! then kill yourself with a gun or something so you dont have to suffer consequences!

Anonymous said...

You seem to be pretty serious about his, and by reading your comments that people have left they all seem to believe you as well. So, we all know you are going to do it and that we can't stop you. You seem to need to make sure that everyone knows you are going to do it and you are not messing around. I think we all realize this by now. So, talking about how you are going to do it is another thing. You must find something that wont fail you. I personaly am not up for any suggestions, but you must realize that 2 out of every 3 suicide attempts are failed. That is pretty high.
Thanks to the Ipower crew and Tania, the creator, 11:11
-Jason
familian1111@yahoo.com

blackjew said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

You can off yourself while getting off from riding me.

Anonymous said...

i think ur senseless unpassionate and u juss never seen the sun long enof to realize life is a treausre a tresure no map could ever help u find life is a jewel stronger then diamond more flexible then fuking i dunno rubber. and ur full of urself u dont juss not care about other people's opinions u dont care about anything, selvish bitch an i leave it there except ur stunningly beautiful and u shouldn't kill urself cuz, watever fuking reason u have stop being a sensless whore pull ur godam dignity together and stare at the sun. find that jewel find that... umm rubber. and fukin live past that stupid ass 90 day deadline u given urself stop being so godamn stubborn this is so disturbing u could have jusss changed y life for the worst and now i cant type juss cuz im fujin shaking soo godfma bad cuz ur so sensless whore i mean shit.... u beatiful peice of shit!

Unknown said...

The Hemingway Solution. Take a long barreled shotgun, remove one shoe and one sock, insert your big toe into the trigger, put barrel into mouth, pushing against your soft palate. Depress trigger with toe. Did I forget to mention to load the gun? Seems like it goes without saying.

Anonymous said...

Headbutting a sidewalk is the manliest way to go down.

Jessica S said...

One minute you share a room with your sister (Day 73) and the next you have your own apartment. Curious, don't ya think?

Anonymous said...

you could go out dressing like a slut -- that way if you end up getting raped .. you can just tell the guy afterwards.. that alright.. kill me now because its what i want.. at least you;ll end up getting fucked one last time before you die.. :-)